Sunflower Wheat Toast

There's this bread, right? And it makes seriously the best toast I have ever had. It even beats that cinnamon swirl toast. I KNOW RIGHT?! It's just that good! It's this Sunflower Wheat bread from the Co-Op by my place and it is mind blowing. God damn, I love toast.

It's summer! I hate summer. I hate heat. I hate humidity. I hate people. All of which summer in Minneapolis is full of. But it's nice out. So I do enjoy walking around to places and my school campus is really pretty because all the grass is green and Loring Park is like right there and everything is leafy and beautiful and the dandelion fountain is uncovered and running... it's nice. It's just really not my favorite season. 
When April hit and it started getting nicer out, I was like WHAT? And then I remembered that Minneapolis actually gets a real spring, unlike Duluth which gets the weather-shits and just poops all over everything as a weird sort of slushy wintery mix and as soon as all the nice ladies plant their gardens, it snows three inches of wet, heavy snow. And then it freezes at night. And water mains break. And you're out of running water for half a day. And you have to hold your poops. And you hate your life. Springtime in Duluth. That's it.

 

And yes, it's sad. But it is what it is. And just two-ish hours south of Duluth, spring is nice! The weather gets warmer, it rains periodically, flowers start popping up and lilac trees bloom! It's so weird and cool for someone who's not used to it. I swear, I was still bringing my pea coat around late into the month just in case of some freaky random weather apocalypse. Well, that did happen once actually.  Middle of April, a massive freaking snowstorm ravaged Minneapolis. That wasn't fun in any way. I'm not one to hate on snow but in April?! Seriously. What did we do to anger the gods?! Not enough human sacrifices, probably. We've been skating by on monetary offerings when what they really wanted was blood. Obviously.

I watched 'Jumangi' a couple of days ago. Remind me never to do that again. I hate 'Jumangi'. So much. Always have. It freaks me out and I don't like jungles, man.

I also started watching this thing called "Attack on Titan" and it's scary good. Is it bad that I cried after the first episode? I think so. Emotions? NOPE. But I can't stop watching! It's visceral for an anime... Mom, don't get on me for watching anime still. I'm allowed. Especially the weird and scary ones. And this one is weird and scary. And gory. And beautifully animated. I love it. Now watch me be emotional about it for the duration of the series.

 

KABOOM. Dramatic cover image! That shit is REAL.

Does anyone else get uncomfortable watching those toilet paper commercials with the bears and they talk about their clean asses? I get uncomfortable. Bears don't use toiler paper. They also don't talk much less about their asses, tp free or not. 
I went for drinks with this dude last week, on a completely different note. It sucked. He reminded me, looks and vocally, like my friend Megan. It was so weird. I was just so not interested in him after I made that connection! Also he made a big stink about beer and various other alcoholic beverages. AS I WAS DRINKING A BEER. So dumb. Just dumb. Dumb and stupid. Over it.
On the other hand, I have a thing planned for this Saturday with a different guy. We've been talking for a while and he seems really cool. Granted, talking to that other guy got me to think he was cool so I guess we'll see what's what when I actually meet this different dude. He seems like less of a child, attitude-wise so that's cool.

Lately I've been all about pirates and I don't know what's up with that. But I'm so okay with it because pirates are so awesome. Like really.

Anne Bonny. LOVE HER

I wanna be that!

hey

Basically, it's been a month since I posted something here. Part of that was school shit and some other parts were personal shit, sprinkled with all kinds of the usual shit. Pretty much, this past month has been one big shit cocktail. But hey! It's June now and hopefully things with be looking up. I'm already feeling good about it so that's something.
Today is my parents' wedding anniversary and that's also something. 
Last night, Kayleen came over and we went to dinner at a place downtown called The Local which I friggin' love because it's awesome. It's even more awesome now that the weather is nice because you get to eat outside and yesterday's weather was gorgeous. Kind of bipolar, but in a good way. We also scoped out attractive people and then there was this super loud, intense rally/march/whatever about serving justice to domestic terrorists which isn't something you're normally prepared to deal with over apps and delicious beer, but what are you gonna do?
After that, we trekked to the Target Center where we had pretty awesome seats to see The Lumineers, Cold War Kids, and J Roddy Walston and The Business who neither of us had heard of before last night but they were a welcome surprise and they're pretty much my new favorite. As of a couple of hours ago, my iTunes is full of their stuff. And they're pretty piano based as their lead is their pianist who is very strongly against playing keyboards for shows. He has a custom amped up piano thing that he brings along on tours because, and I'm paraphrasing an actual quote, "you wouldn't ask a guitarist to play a keytar for a show, would you?" Also their drummer kind of looks like if Dan Auerbach and Ryan Gosling had a baby, so there you go.

Rainbow Unicorn Attack

Can we talk about the stomach ache that I've had for over twenty four hours? It's driving me crazy. Like it's not a constant pain, it's just a twinge every minute or so and it's so annoying. It kicked in on Tuesday night around seven thirty while I was in class and the only things I had to eat beforehand were eggs for breakfast and a Builder Bar between my classes, and I had water in the morning and coffee before and throughout class. Definitely thought I hadn't eaten enough so I went home after class and made some noodles but it still hurt. It wasn't getting worse, nor was it getting better by any means and today it's the same thing. It's not a symptom of fun lady times, I can tell you that much. This has never happened before and I'm starting to get paranoid. 
Basically, I have to keep telling myself not to go on a Wikipedia hunt for various parasitic life forms that live in the upper regions of the human stomach. That's how freaked out I am. I'm not a fan of this.
Watching 'Fringe' doesn't help. That show is all about weird stuff that comes popping out of people! It's gross! Why do I keep watching it? Beats me.
I have to give a presentation to my theatre class next Tuesday. Guess what? Something I learned last spring in my Renaissance Drama class is actually going to help me. Surprise! No one is more surprised than I am, I assure you. That class was a waste of time and kind of so is this one, but at least I'm having fun in this class and it's a whole hour and a half later in the day. So I'll be writing a paper about the Christopher Marlowe vs William Shakespeare conspiracy theory or whatever and presenting that. What I love about my professor is that she's so open to everything that everyone's projects are "wow you did a superb job!" to her. She's great. I love Maxine.

I

I have to pull my shit together these next few days and pump out three screenplays by the seventh. It's going to happen. It has to happen. Because once it happens, all I'll have to focus on is editing, one more paper, and one final exam, the BOOM. Done. And I'll get to go home for a while which will be nice. 
Sadie will be graduating high school soon and then she'll move to basically almost Fargo so that's weird. Fargo's weird too. Alaina will be...not doing anything exciting school wise, but she will still be a good three and a half inches taller than me, so that's something. I'm officially the shortest member of my immediate family. My dad's only a bit taller than me. But both my YOUNGER sisters are taller than me. But I have the smallest, cutest feet so that's something.
Minneapolis has been experiencing some extreme summer-like weather these past few days. On Friday, it was in the sixties and on Saturday, the high was seventy five and it was like that until today where we had shit weather again. Minnesota, man. What are you gonna do?

Lately I've been needing to periodically talk myself off the I-Really-Really-Want-To-Adopt-A-Pug ledge. I don't know what's come over me, but one thing is certain; I really really want to adopt a pug. 
And today was worse cos my mom was like 'oh let's send Rachel a bunch of cute videos of our dog playing with the neighbors' cute new puppy. that'll make her homesick." Thanks, ma.
  

Merp

So here's the deal; There are two full weeks left in the semester. I have three screenplays due in that time and on the seventh, I have my final due. The week after that are finals and final meetings with my prof. Like whoa. Also my production class. holy shitballs my production class. I had plans to film my final this afternoon but my actor got sick. And I got his text in the middle of a meeting with a screenwriter/producer and an agent so that gave me a heart attack. I was on the verge of tears.
I wanted to go home. I needed to get away from here for a while. I wanted to come home and cry and not think about anything. But I remembered that my parents and Sadie are out of town, Alaina is with friends for the weekend and Rigby is at a kennel so that wouldn't work out. So I went to Sarah's Horse Expo instead. I got a big, awesome hug from her mom and I got to hang out with pretty horses and talk to cool people and break in my new boots so it was a good day. And the weather was beautiful. When I got to the fairgrounds at like one, it was 65 degrees. Beautiful!! 
https://vine.co/v/bxz5Ma3VQAJ << And that is a short video I made with an awesome horsey named Isaac... which I think is kind of a dumb name for a horse, but what are you gonna do?
 

Flannel Sheets

I submit that flannel is quite possibly the world's most comfy fabric. I love flannel. If you're wearing a flannel shirt, expect a hug because I just want to snuggle the fabric. Not you. You are less than flannel. Except... flannel is toasty and I've reached that point where it's too warm outside and in my apartment for my flannel sheets. It kind of bums me out, but I'm also pretty okay with it. SPRING TIME!
Oh man, these next four to five weeks are going to be nuts. With a capital NUT. 

I just have a butt-ton of school things to take care of in a rapid fashion. Filming, editing, writing BLAH. By the time May 15th rolls around (cos I'll be done by then), I'm going to be exhausted, mentally and physically. But it'll be worth it because I will have completed my first year of a brand new program (for me) and I'll be on my way to my screenwriting degree. Fuzz yeah.
The family was here earlier today. It was a kind of late birthday hangout session which was cool. We went out for dinner at this really cool Irish pub downtown last night...but I forgot to bring my ID so I couldn't order a beer which sucked. With a capital SUCK. 
And today we went to the Mall of America where I ran into this radical dude...

Yeah! It was a shell of a time.  

Burfdai

Yesterday was my birthday and I am so happy. I'm finally 21 and now every other birthday just seems irrelevant. I went out with John John and he bought me my first legal beer which was this amazing Game of Thrones themed blonde ale called Iron Throne and it was delicious. I also had some super awesome meatballs and made some awesome sexy eye contact with this awesome sexy bartender so that was that. And Meredith is in town for the day so I had lunch with her earlier today and I think we might hang out a little later too. I'm just super happy :)

Spring Time

I would really like to sit down and read a book for fun. All I've been doing lately is plan. I'm planning filming days, I'm planning group projects, I'm working on a script, final paper, and presentation for my theater class, I have to come up with a twelve-page short film idea to pitch to my professor by tonight and then I have to write up everything. Everything's on a schedule for me. I should be able to take care of everything. I'm trying my hardest to take care of everything. But what I really want to do is read something for fun. I don't want to write, I don't want to type, I don't want to do research, I want to read. I want to disappear into a novel and just read. But I can't. Not until May sixteenth when the semester ends for me.
Screenwriting is hard. It's hard but I want to keep doing it. I just need the ideas to start flowing easier. I don't know what's wrong with me. I know that there's no such thing as an original idea anymore, everything's already been done, but there's still a part of me that's trying, and failing, to come up with something that no one has ever heard of before. Maybe that's why I'm so frustrated lately. Frustrated and so willing to let things go. 
But I can't let this go. This is what I want. I want to be in this business. I want to make movies. I want to make stories that people connect to and people want to see. Hey, if all of that fails, maybe I will have met someone along the way who knows a publisher or two and I can get a book deal. That would be cool. An author is something I've had in mind for longer than movie maker.

I want summer to be here. It's already getting warm and nice outside. It's been sunny for like an entire week now which is weird for Minnesota. But I could go for a thunderstorm. Like a real, all day, all night, gloomy skies, off-and-on torrential downpour, thunder and lightening storm. Preferably on a day that I don't have school so I can hang out all day.
My excellent tea shipment arrived in the mail earlier this week and I am so happy. This Hot Cinnamon Spice tea from Harney & Sons is phenomenal! I've never been more stoked about tea before.

I've been having some insane dreams lately. Like last night, I dreamt that I was in church and then someone named Cecelia was pronounced dead and my friend standing next to me started crying because apparently, Cecelia was her grandmother. And then I was hanging around with my parents at my uncle Joel's house and they were discussing wedding plans. Like I was supposed to fly to Denver and then we would go to some reindeer sanctuary or whatever and I was going to marry Sir Ian McKellen...I don't know, we fist-bumped and I guess that means that we were meant for each other. Then I was like, "bye", and I was in this weird stairway, trying to get Tom Felton away from photographers or a killer or something. And I lost him in a crowd and then Scott McCall from Teen Wolf (the MTV on, obvs) ran into me like "oh hey, how's it going?" And I kept getting lost in this high school and there was this talent show and Scott and Alison were singing into auto-tuned microphones and it sounded okay in my dream, but knowing how dreams are, it was probably all gibberish. And then my alarm went off and i woke up like, "Ian McKellen? Really?"

 
Seems legit.

Five days until my birthday. Still don't know what I'm going to do. Maybe I'll just sleep in and eat poptarts or something. 

Dexter

There's been this niggling feeling at the back of my mind that I'm not doing the right thing with my life. Maybe it's just me in a seasonal slump or something but school doesn't feel right, my friends don't feel right, I'm just kind of blah. It's like senioritis but I'm not even that. 
Next week is my birthday and I'm not really sure what I'm going to do about it. It's on a Wednesday, so I can't really do the traditional go out with friends and get sloshed thing...is that still a tradition? Whatever, the point is that I'm probs not going to do it. I do have plans to go out on Friday with John John though so that will be cool. I hope.
  

Blister

I just spent the last two days with John John and I'm so tired! Of walking, of going places, of doing stuff. Tired. Sleepy and tired. Yesterday, he and I met up for brunch and it was fun and the guy who took our order was wearing a Top Gun trucker hat and it was awesome. And then he and I went to go get our drivers licenses renewed which was...boring but at least I got that done. And then he had to go to work so I went home for a while but after that, I went to his apartment at the University and we watched Once Upon A Time and I slept over. And then today we went to the Mall of America and meandered around. We went to Bubba Gump's and it was a shrimp extravaganza, reminding me of how deep my hate for themed restaurants goes. But the food was good, I'll give them that. And now I'm back at my place.
John took me to this AMAZING store in the mall today. Think Body Shop but completely organic and fresh and preservative-less and never tested on animals. It's called Lush and it's seriously my new favorite place. It smells fantasmic and everyone in there is so cool. I got this hand treatment while I was there and my hands are so soft now and my cuticles are flawless. I'm so stoked. I got myself a couple of bath bombs, these fizzy bath thingies that kind of explode in the water and make you all soft and bubbly, and a bubble bath bar, and because I made a big, giddy deal about Lush being my new favorite spot in the mall, I got a free little sample of this soap that smells like cherry candy. It's so cool!

 

I'm so excited to take a bath now. 

My one problem with these past couple of days is that I have a couple of super painful blisters on my left foot from walking around so much or whatever. But it's so frustrating. I mean, of all the places for blisters to be, the bottom of a foot is the worst place. I walk on my feet! This is so stupid.

  

I just got done Skyping my guy and he's still kind of convinced that he wants to get another dog. I really can't talk him out of anything because A) I'm just his girlfriend, B) I don't live with him, nor am I in the vicinity of where he lives, and C) He's an adult and is going to make his own decisions. Anyway so he was just running various breeds of dogs by me because he knows that I'm a weird dog person and kind of a dog breed connoisseur as far as compatibility and temperament and exercise and attention and grooming needs so I like to think I was kind of helpful. I told him that if he's really set on it, wait till summer. Also to start talking to breeders or people who are looking to sell their pregnant dog's puppies. See what's what. I also said that he might want to consider a smaller breed. His dog now is a fairly hefty chocolate lab, but because he's so old, he really doesn't need much more than two feedings a day, two walks, and some love. Which he gets. Buddy's such a sweet dog. So I suggested looking at bulldogs, French, not English because English bulldogs are kind of known for having a lot of health issues. I also mentioned smaller terriers. I think that Eric would look cute with a Boston Terrier or a Rat Terrier. He's convinced that he wants a dog a little on the bigger side. He said that he doesn't "want to feel like he's going to crush the dog when he snuggles it" and I understand. Maybe a Boxer or something. He just doesn't want anything that has super long and fluffy hair. In the end, he'll make the right choice.

Hahaha look at that fat, adorable, dorky puppy!! Cute cute cute!

Mean Stinks

Mean Stinks is this campaign going on aiming to end girl on girl bullying which I am totally behind. It's in every human to be a little vile sometimes, but when a girl turns on another girl, it gets especially vicious.
I've been bullied and I admit that I haven't been Miss Congeniality either, but I've always done my best to treat other girls and women with the respect we deserve. If we as women can't respect ourselves and each other, how can we expect the same from anyone else?

BLUE PINKIE CHALLENGE!!

 

BBQ Chips

Can we talk about how shitty waking up early is? It's pretty shittastic. It's worse if it's still dark outside because that just makes you want to sleep more but you can't because the second you opened your eyes, you put yourself on a schedule and you have to jump in the shower and do all of that business and then do your hair and find clothes and eat and blah blah blah mornings are gross. I hate them. 

I have to take a test today in my waste-of-time theatre class. I have two whole study guides of questions that are guarantied to be on the test and I've read them over several times but I still feel unprepared. I also feel like I want crepes.
Spring break is fast approaching and I am so excited to not have anything really big to do for a week. Kayleen is coming to stay with me for a few days which is going to be awesome!! She hasn't been down to see me since August and while I've seen her many times in between, it's not the same. It's going to be the chillest time ever. We're probably literally going to do nothing. It's going to be great.
Is it unacceptable to have bbq chips for breakfast? Because I have some and I really want them. I also have regular breakfast food though. So what'll it be? Bbq chips or cereal? Life decisions.
 I declared screenwriting as my major for next year. So that's that. That's what I'll be doing in the next two semesters. I'm nervous. I feel like I'm not doing very well this semester. I seem to be struggling and I don't know why. The exercises aren't hard but I'm just not getting the best scores. It's too early to talk about this right now. Pleh.
There's this Mattel franchise called 'Monster High' and it's basically Bratz dolls but cooler and they're all supposedly the children of all these classic movie/literature monsters like Dracula, Frankenstein and Bride of, the Creature from the Black Lagoon, etc. They're pretty cute. And their website also has these adorable webisodes that I've recently been sucked into. They're cute. Cute, cute, cute. And senseless which is why I like them. Also the characters are funny on their own and I catch all these weird little monster movie references like how one of their teachers at school is based off of Leatherhead. I don't know, I just think it's cute.

Obviously, it's aimed at younger girls but so are the Barbie movies and Sadie still got excited about the new one being on tv and upset when Alaina wasn't at home to record it so... that's that.
Ugh gross, I just don't want to go to school today. It's going to be so dumb. First that test then I have to meet with my adviser to talk registration and try to get it through her head that I do NOT need to take a basic science course because I've already done that and it shows on all of my records-- but NOOOOOO she seems to think that I still need to take it!! Dummy face. Anyway. After that, I have to go to cinema history and watch some movie I won't like and try to stay awake in a dark room for three hours surrounded by people who also don't care. I just really don't care.
   

How cool would it be to be a dragon? I see no downsides to being a dragon.
  

Breezeblocks

Fun fact, another word for cinderblocks is breezeblocks. 

This past weekend was an explosive three days of stress and sleeplessness and fun. I was a production assisstant on a student capstone film. Basically I was dressing the set and we were in this dude's actual house and before we messed with it, it was actually super cute. Then we messed it up and moved a whole bunch of shit around and put up new art and lit some fake flowers on fire accidentally... it was just a lot of fun. I met a lot of really cool, fun people and then I got to play with the slate! FUN!!

Supes dupes fun.